Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Kitty say what?

I just got this awesome email from my dad. I think that I must share it. I am changing it ( and adding pictures of our pets) to reflect our family a little bit, but otherwise it is very fitting.


Excerpt's from Buddy's Journal
8:00 am -
Dry Cat food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am -
A drink from the bathroom faucet! My favorite thing!
9:40 am -
A nap on Mommy and Daddy's bed! My favorite thing!
10:30 am -
Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 pm -
Nap Again! My favorite thing!
1:00 pm -
Chased kitty! My favorite thing!
3:00 pm -
Chased my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 pm -
Nap Again fabulous! My favorite thing!
7:00 pm -
Dinner, dry cat food! My favorite thing!
8:00 pm -
Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 pm -
Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!


Excerpt's from Kitty's Diary-
Day 983 of my captivity.
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.

They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.

The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomited on the carpet.
Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am. Jerks.

There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of "allergies." I must learn what this means and how to use it to my advantage.

Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs.
I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches.
My so called brother Bu-D doesn't seem to get my drift. Even hissing and spitting right in his face doesn't dissuade him.
The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously not all there.

The Bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicating with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now.........

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